Special to MSN TV

Though they fought some of the worst battles on this season's "Amazing Race," former "Big Brother" contestants and "The Amazing Race 20" third-place finishers Brendon Villegas and Rachel Reilly are actually both completely engaging and engaged. Here are their thoughts on the nail-biter of a season finale, which saw them make what Rachel termed "a million-dollar mistake." 

Bing: More about 'The Amazing Race' | Photos: Meet the teams

What was it like going straight from the Big Brother house to "The Amazing Race"?  

Rachel: That was the craziest part. We only had a month between the two shows. And after you finish "Big Brother," you need a year-long vacation. But I was coming in from the house -- which I was in for 76 days -- on such a high [after winning]. 

Brendon: It's just such a different ball game. "Big Brother" is a mentally challenging game, even when you're not [directly] competing with somebody else. "Amazing Race" is really just about your partner and how well you communicate. 

Rachel: That's the biggest thing. On the "Race," you are your own biggest enemy. 

Brendon: We learned a lot about each other. You see how you act, and sometimes you're proud, and sometimes you're not so proud. 

And are you still together? 

Rachel: Oh, of course. We're going to get married soon. We're going from "The Amazing Race" to planning a wedding. We're shooting for September. We're house hunting right now. 

Where did the fights with Vanessa start? 

Brendon: I had animosity toward both of them the whole race. But it was really stuff Vanessa was saying. It wasn't really Ralph. She was just not a nice girl. Vanessa's very attractive, but she's threatened by other girls who are pretty. 

Do you regret not taking advantage of the Fast Forward that would have meant shaving your head? 

Rachel: I don't really have any regrets about the race. If I'd known the prize [for winning the leg] was $10,000 each, maybe! But I'm getting married. 

Brendon: It was going to be up to her. As a guy, I can't know what it would be like to shave her head. I understood it when she said, "The wedding" -- and I thought, "Let's move on." 

And what about that final error last night, when you guys misread a clue leading to the helicopters? 

Rachel: That one is so hard. You guys saw our reaction, when you realize you just made a million-dollar mistake that ultimately cost us the race. We were neck and neck with Dave and Rachel. And if we'd continued racing the way we had been ... they had made a mistake. I completely lost it. I was mad at Brendon; I was mad at myself. It was my fault. It wasn't like a taxi driver. That was the worst. 

Will we see you back on another reality TV show? 

Rachel: I guess never say never. But I think Brendon and I are really focused on our wedding and buying a home. 

Brendon: I'm doing my Ph.D., so I'm focused on that. But if Rachel wanted to, I wouldn't get in her way. 

So what's better:"The Amazing Race" or "Big Brother"? 

Rachel: They're so different!

Brendon: You're asking us to choose between our children.

Special to MSN TV

Fourth-place finishers Ralph Kelley and Vanessa Macias didn't fight as much as some of the other coupled-up teams. But the freelance writer and bar owner are, nonetheless, no longer together. After a gritty final episode in which Vanessa, with a sprained ankle, took on one of the season’s most challenging tasks, we talked to them about watching the finale last night, paying their respects in Hiroshima, and the start of the battles with Rachel and Brendon.

Bing: More about 'The Amazing Race' | Photos: Meet the teams

What it like watching Sunday night's episode? 

Vanessa: It was the one episode I couldn't sit down and watch. It's like watching the sinking of the Titanic. If you're on the Titanic, you don't want to see it go down. After a couple glasses of wine, I did watch it on the DVR. 

Still, Vanessa, it seems like you should be proud of how hard you went after that challenge.

Ralph: It says a lot about her character that she left it all out there. She'll be the first one to tell you, though, that she should have listened to me and gone to the gym. 

Vanessa: I don't know if that would have changed anything.

Ralph: It might have. But it doesn't matter. She was a bad ass. She showed a lot of heart. And it was heartbreaking watching it. 

Was there anything you could have done differently? 

Vanessa: No. We were going tit-for-tat on the Roadblocks, and when I had to do it, we were joking in the cab about if it'd be a physical challenge, like, "Leap this building" or something ridiculous. 

Ralph: We tried to strategize where I was doing the more physical ones, but this couldn't be avoided. 

Vanessa: The one thing we would have done differently, overall, is the Fast Forward [in India.] I knew there was a reason Rachel was crying [when she and Brendon failed to take the Fast Forward because Rachel didn’t want to shave her head], and she was, like, "Why don't you go try the Fast Forward?" I knew there was something behind it. But she didn't know that I totally would have cut my hair. But still, our position in the race wasn’t in jeopardy because Mark and Bopper were so totally behind. So I’m not sure it would have mattered.

What was your favorite moment on the race? 

Ralph: My grandmother's Japanese, so going to Japan was really special. And I'm a history nut, so being able to stop at the memorial [in Hiroshima] for a minute was incredible.  

Did they actually make you stay there? 

Ralph: Yeah, it was written into the clue that you had to be there for so many minutes. It was hard because you’re racing, and the other teams are standing right there. And it was awesome that the show made us take a few minutes to stand there and take it in. 

Why do you think you and Rachel had such tension all the way throughout the race, Vanessa? 

Vanessa: At the very first airport, there was a conversation where she attacked my personal and political views, and then one comment led to another. It was really just a lot of personalities. We would probably never get along in the real world. I tend to deal really well with difficult personalities. But if we'd been in a country where they don't extradite …

Ralph: Everything was left where it was. 

Vanessa: I apologized for the nose [job] comments. That was below the belt. And after [the race], we were humans to each other. But we're not having tea and crumpets. 

Are you guys still together? 

Ralph: We're not. 

It seemed like the race was really hard on everyone's relationships, even Rachel and Dave. And they’re married.

Vanessa: We were actually building our tent [in Tanzania] next to Dave and Rachel, and I was like, Wow, they aren't getting along very well. There was just sort of a major and soldier relationship there. More like cold -- not abrasive. But they're still together, so they're doing something right. 

Special to MSN TV

Art Velez and J.J. Carroll suffered an excruciating second-place finish in last night's finale of "The Amazing Race." Believing they were in second place, the border patrol agents had difficulty with a challenge that saw Art careening down a hill on a narrow sled. But things got much, much worse when they realized that they were actually squandering what had been a fairly substantial lead over eventual winners Rachel and Dave.

Bing: More about 'The Amazing Race' | Photos: Meet the teams

We spoke with the pair about that final leg, interrogating Jamie and Nary, and their Pit Stop promise to Mark and Bopper. 

Was that sledding challenge as tough as it looked? 

Art: That didn't even come to close to showing how grueling that was. I give props to Rachel; she hopped on that thing and on the second time down, she was done. 

How many times, Art, did you go down the hill? 

Art: I'd say 40? 

J.J.: I think it was closer to 50. 

What was it like figuring out that you'd actually been in first place the whole time? 

J.J.: I actually heard their voices first. Then we knew. We'd thought we were second. 

J.J., what was it like for you watching Art have such a tough time? 

J.J.: It was tough. I knew how he has the same competitive desire that I do. What people don't understand is the anxiety and the frustration that goes into it, every time. Then you start getting the attitude that “I'm not going to be able to do it.” I think a lesser man would have said, "This isn't worth it" or given up. He knew he had to get down there. If I took him up on the hill right now, I'm sure he'd get it on the first try. It was just one of those things that didn't work out. But that's just how life is.

Art: When we walked up there, they were holding three sleds, and I was like, "This is going to be a piece of cake. I want to get a sled that's the quickest." So I chose the sled with the thinnest rails. Once you got it, that's the one. I never thought about not being able to balance. I just wanted to get down fast. I was looking at the sled with thick rails and thought, I need something faster. It's was as different as an ice skate to something pretty thick. 

Was it torture watching Sunday night's episode? 

Art: It was fun! We had close to 300 people watching it with us last night, and it was a blast. Of course we wanted to win, but our goal was to race to the end, and we did that. 

When you saw the fight you had with Dave and Rachel over the U Turn. Do you wish you'd been a little less aggressive about it? 

Art: To me, we're men of our word. We're men of integrity. You hear Dave and Rachel, like, "It wasn't this and that … " We had a plan -- to take the strongest teams to the finals, Ralph and Vanessa, Mark and Bopper, and Rachel and Dave, and it'd be all bets off to the final. If they'd done what they said they would do … If Dave and Rachel had been in [our] position, they would have been just as mad. 

How did you guys know Jamie and Nary were lying about being teachers? 

Art: My wife's a teacher. My mom's a teacher. My whole family's a family of educators. When you talk to them, they talk about kids or teachers or parents or administrators. We were like, "They say they're teachers, but they're not talking like teachers." People lie to us in our job every day, and our job is to figure out who's lying. But it didn't really matter because it was actually kind of funny. It's just part of the game. Personally, I could have cared less. 

How did the race change your relationship? 

Art: With J.J.? I hate him. [Laughs.] You know what, we became friends when we started working together, but now we're brothers. This is something I'll cherish for the rest of my life. He's an awesome, great man of integrity and value and conviction, and it's a good thing to have those kinds of people in your life. 

J.J. We'll be friends for life. One thing that sticks out in my mind: Art comes off as sometimes very direct and harsh in his professional life, but in his own life, he's a good, strong and Christian family man. When I got done Bollywood dancing, we got back in the rickshaw. It was the hardest thing I've ever had to do. Instead of railing on me, he goes, "You know, you did really good. We're in good shape." I remember sitting in that rickshaw, and I hoped if that had happened to Art I would be that good of a man. That was a poignant moment for me. 

As to that Bollywood challenge, were the judges too strict? 

J.J. No, I'm just a horrible dancers. I think the judges gave me the okay out of straight mercy. I have fond memories of those judges. 

And what about your promise to share your leg winnings of $10,000 with Bopper's daughter, who's been seriously ill? 

J.J. Absolutely. As far as we're concerned, we're considering those proceeds to be distributed by CBS. 

By Diane Vadino

Special to MSN TV

Previously: Kentucky buddies Mark and Bopper bowed to the inevitable -- and go back to Clay County after suffering a mortal wound at a game-ending Bollywood challenge. 

Bing: More about 'The Amazing Race' | Photos: Meet the teams

Sunday night: We're headed back to America -- which means we're at the end of this season's "Amazing Race." Phil takes us on a brief trip back through the episodes: Remember Maiya and Misa, who ran in the opposite direction of the Pitstop? Dave, the clown who couldn't do math? Joey Fitness and Danny? Jamie and Nary? We were "bewildered in Baku" and "taken aback in Tanzania," and now we're left with the final four teams -- who are actually preempted by a lengthy recap of Kentucky soul brothers Mark and Bopper. (Never before has a fifth-place team earned such a devotional. But they -- "the best friends competed with their hearts on their sleeves," as Phil describes them, and the season’s most popular team -- deserve it!) Unfortunately, we're left with four other pairings: still-squabbling couple Dave and Rachel; occasionally (but not terribly) quarrelsome couple Vanessa and Ralph; bickering couple Rachel and Brendon, and the border patrol agents, who are just sort of jerks a lot of the time. 

Six-time leg-winners Dave and Rachel are the first to leave Cochin, at 1:51 p.m. -- and we're headed for Hiroshima, Japan, and then Miyajima Island. Everyone's on the same flight there, so we have a chance to quickly visit with the four remaining teams -- particularly Dave and Rachel, whose contentious relationship has been a recurring theme this season. "I don't necessarily view Rachel as my wife," Dave says. "I view her as my teammate, my peer." Rachel has an alternate, and probably more accurate suggestion for how Dave views her: "Solider," she says. "Solider." 

Once in Japan, the teams begin a fairly epic trek to the island -- by bus, train, and then by ferry. A tiny bit of jockeying occurs, and Rachel and Brendon miss the first bus. ("They never know where they're going," J.J. says.) But the most seemingly meaningful one occurs when Dave and Rachel, who'd arrived too late for the train, also miss the ferry. The super-bad news: The leading three teams got the last one for the night, and Dave and Rachel won't be able to get to the island until morning. "This just proves that every second counts," Dave says, petulantly. 

It turns out that Dave is wrong, and the delay actually doesn’t count for much: Much like in Argentina, the clue arrives at dawn, so Rachel and Dave don't actually lose any time at all. (Or, as Rachel puts it, "[Dave] can take his poopy pants off now.") Teams are first directed to pay their respects at the city's serene but sorrowful peace memorial, and then to travel by bullet train to Osaka and its TV 8 studio. Art and J.J. and Vanessa and Ralph take cabs, while the other two travel by public transportation -- the slower choice. When Vanessa and Ralph's cab gets lost (just the first unfortunate event in a problem-plagued leg for them), Art and J.J. have the challenge all to themselves: "Who wants to bring home the chicken?" reads the clue. It turns out we're at an insane Japanese game show, in which players have to run along a treadmill, grab three chickens hanging from the ceiling, and then race all the way to a mat -- a mini-Pit Stop. It's hysterical, and very hard, and when Art's done, he gives the host a massive hug. From there, the teams go to the Umeda Sky Building for their next clue. 

Vanessa is forced to do the chicken challenge to stay even with Ralph, and it's hard to think of a more difficult job for someone who just sprained her ankle. "I'm hoping it's nothing all too physical," she says, on the way into the studio -- but of course, it is one of the season’s most physically demanding. Ralph's face, as he begins to understand the nature of the Roadblock, is a mask of terror. "I don't know what to do!" Vanessa wails. Ralph is all for quitting and taking the penalty. "I'm telling you what to do," he says. "How many times are you going to do this -- ’til it breaks?" Vanessa, for once, is an absolute picture of grit: She takes off her long-sleeved top and helmet and literally says to herself, "I can do this." She grabs the third chicken. "You're going to have to run like you've never run before," Ralph says, prepping her for the end. She dashes down the treadmill, falls, and ends up in a pile of balloons. She does it one more time -- and makes it. 

The other teams have moved on to the Roadblock: Bingo Shout Out or Photo Cut Out. In the former, teams play a complicated version of bingo involving sushi; in the other, they need to convince 30 passersby to pose in giant cut-outs of sumo wrestlers. Only Rachel and Dave take the sumo challenge, while everyone else goes for sushi. They're still fighting, by the way: "Silence is golden," Dave says, about some perceived failing of Rachel's. "Then why don't you shut the **** up?" At least Rachel sticks up for herself -- small victories. Though this seems like it could be a hard task, true to form they handily convince the 30 people to pose -- and they're the first ones to leave for the Pit Stop, at Osaka Castle. 

Art and J.J. are en route to sushi bingo: "Old men love sushi, and old men love bingo," Art says. It's possible that even now none of the teams know precisely how it works: The bingo caller yells out types of sushi, and then everyone has to match the fish and the letter to string five hits in a row. It looks like they're just sort of randomly throwing the fish down on the board. Art and J.J. finish first -- stuffing their mouth with the five winning pieces of sushi, which was a random addition to the challenge -- while Brendon and Rachel make their way through their own board. Vanessa and Ralph are still playing when Team Big Brother heads for the Pit Stop. 

Much is made here of the three trailing teams failing to find it -- at one point, nemeses Big Brother and border patrol run into each other -- but it's pretty clear that Vanessa and Ralph won't be able to make up the time lost on the chicken challenge. "I'm really hoping another team got lost or abducted by aliens," Vanessa says, as they finally get into the taxi. It doesn't happen, though -- they're out, in fourth place. "I would never want to do this with anyone else," Ralph says. "From here on out, it's smooth sailing -- unless there are rubber chickens," Vanessa says. 

But we're moving on: to Hawaii, for the final leg of the race. After a 12-hour flight, teams are directed to a vague destination involving twins -- which Dave and Rachel's cabbie realizes refer to the twin towers in Pearl City. Dave bonds with his ex-Army driver, and he quickly loses J.J. and Art, who'd been trailing them. Team Big Brother is clued in on the answer by the cab dispatcher at the airport, so it's only the border patrol agents who have no idea where to go. They're directed to "a statue of a guy of a boogie board" -- definitely the wrong place -- and wander around lost until a passerby takes pity on them and explains the answer. 

At the towers, Dave and Rachel are first to the challenge: to pull themselves up the length of the 45-story tower and then to rappel, face-forward, down it. "This is like extreme 'Amazing Race,'" Rachel, of “Big Brother” says. From the top of the tower, teams can see a flag marking the next stop -- across some water at Sand Island State Recreation Area. There, teams face a pretty easy-looking Roadblock (at least for anyone who still has any upper-body strength left after the tower climb) -- all they're doing is shaving ice (14 quarts worth) from an ice block. Rachel and Rachel, waiting for their partners to finish, can see Art and J.J. rappelling down the face of the tower. "They look like little bugs -- I want to squish them," Dave's Rachel says. 

From there, teams are instructed to go “by foot” to helicopters. Pilot Dave is all too cool for school about it: "I'm normally not a passenger," he says. Rachel and Brendon, meanwhile, make the cataclysmically bad decision to take a cab -- which they realize after enough time to put them very solidly in third place. "I don't want crazy Rachel right now," Brendon says. He gets her anyway. 

Rachel and Dave are first to the next task: "Become North Shore lifeguards [and] rescue a distressed swimmer." This involves Rachel manning the Wave Runner and Dave pulling the swimmer onto a sled -- it's not very hard. The next part, though, is: All the teams are directed to Coral Kingdom Gate by taxi: "To have your fate completely in the hands of a stranger" is stressing Dave out. Wherever their driver drops them off, they're soon stand-up paddling across a body of water -- and then running down the path to the final Pit Stop! But Art and J.J., we see, are in first place -- Dave and Rachel skipped a task! (Misa and Maiya, in particular, are stunned.) As they backtrack, Art and J.J. face the final task: sledding down a hill and then rolling a disk into a net. And they face it, over and over and over again: Art just can't stay on the sled. It gets much, much worse for them when Dave and Rachel show up -- and they realize that they were actually wasting away their lead. J.J. is visibly in pain, while Art pretty much hates nothing in the world but sledding. Inevitably, Rachel aces the sled -- and then the bowling. And since they know the way to the Pit Stop already... 

Art and J.J. and the newly arrived Rachel and Brendon find themselves duking it out for second. Rachel and Dave are first. "It was awesome to spend a month together," Rachel says, crying when she talks about how difficult it was for her when Dave was in Iraq. Art and J.J. are second: "Not bad for a couple of old guys," says Art, who is going to have nightmares about that sled for the rest of his life. "'The Amazing Race' has tested our relationship in ways I didn't even think was possible," Brendon says. But what do Bopper and Mark -- by far the most likable team in the final five -- have to say about this, something producers obviously recognize by including them in this season’s final thoughts? "You took two boys from the middle of the country and took them around the world," Bopper says. Is it too soon to start looking forward to them in All Stars? 

By John Kubicek

BuddyTV

This week, the top 5 on "American Idol" proved that they are not just the best final five ever on the show but that they are among the greatest musicians in the history of time and space. At least, that's what the judges believe. 

Bing: More about 'American Idol' | Photos: See the top 5 singers

All kidding aside, they're incredibly good, and this is one tough competition. I look back just two years ago when people like Michael Lynche, Aaron Kelly and Casey James were all in the top 5. None of them should even be mentioned in the same breath as any of the remaining contestants this season.

More: 'American Idol' on BuddyTV | Video: Watch 'American Idol' clips and more

But it's time to say farewell to one. Will it be Phillip Phillips, who was easily the worst singer of the week? Or is it finally Hollie Cavanagh's time after being in the bottom four of the last five weeks?

To be perfectly honest, I'm kind of interested to see what an "American Idol" results show looks like these days. I've just been reading Carla Patton's recaps all season to find out who went home, but since I'm guest-recapping, it means I actually have to watch it. Oh well, if I can spare just one person from having to subject themselves to the inanity of a Ford commercial and an awful group number, then I've done my good deed for the day.

"New Girl" Promo: Randy Jackson's Hot Dawgs in Steven Tyler's Janie's Got a Bun, with Jennifer Lopez's Chili from the Crock. Why isn't Max Greenfield in everything? I'm just happy the adorable Deputy Leo is finally becoming a star like I always knew he would be.

Results, Part 1

Ooh, results right away. Joshua Ledet, one of the best two "Idols" of all time and one of the greatest singers in the past 50 years, is called to the center of the stage. Jimmy Iovine thinks Joshua's "To Love Somebody" is the best performance of the entire season. Meh.  I don't even think it's the best Joshua Ledet performance of the season (that goes to "When a Man Loves a Woman"). And I don't really care about the fact that Joshua can learn a song so quickly. Joshua Ledet is safe. Well, no duh.

Ford Music Video: Yawn. It's fairy-tale themed.

Coldplay Performance No. 1: They perform "Paradise," but I'm distracted by the fact that I think Chris Martin is wearing one of his wife's T-shirts. Sorry, but I'm not a fan of the insanely short sleeves on a T-shirt. In fact, I'm not a fan of famous musicians performing on a big show like "American Idol" in a T-shirt. Dress up, Chris Martin! Although the way he says "Thank you everybody. Thank you so much" at the end is kind of endearing.

Results, Part 2

Hollie and Phillip are called to the center. Either or both of them in the bottom wouldn't surprise me. I hate that Jimmy pronounces the "H" in homage. It's OH-maj, not hom-idge. Jimmy thinks both of Phillip's performances were bland and that he's coasting. He's not wrong -- at all.

Hollie Cavangh is in the bottom 2.
Phillip Phillips is safe.

Well, that's not fair at all, but whatever. We all know Phillip is going to win. And even terrible, bland performances won't stop the inevitable.

Carrie Underwood Performance: She sings "Blown Away," the title track of her new album. It's not my cup of tea, and I prefer the Jeff Bridges movie "Blown Away." If you haven't seen it, go find it now because it's amazing. As far as Carrie is concerned, I think she should play Jenna Maroney's little sister on "30 Rock."

Results, Part 3

It's down to Jessica and Skylar. Ever since my favorite, Colton Dixon, left, Skylar is my girl. So, I have my fingers crossed. Jimmy wasn't feeling Skylar's Dusty Springfield song, mostly because he hated the set and the production with the people on the bench. That's not her fault, is it? Jimmy hated "Proud Mary" because her dress was too short. He blames the stylists (Tommy Hilfiger?) for torpedoing Jessica. Jennifer Lopez turns this into a "Hollywood is OK with making teenage girls sexualized, but Middle America isn't so cool with it" situation.

Jessica Sanchez is safe.
Skylar Laine is in the bottom 2.

No! I barely survived my favorite getting eliminated. I don't think I can stomach watching my second favorite go too.

Coldplay Performance #2: They do "Every Teardrop Is a Waterfall." Seriously, that's the title of a song? That's the cheesiest thing I've ever heard. Also, I know Chris Martin is only 35, but he's way too old to be acting like he is on stage, just spinning and hopping around like a toddler or a college kid at his first rave.

Results, Part 4

It's down to Hollie and Skylar. Hollie is in the bottom for the fifth time in six weeks. Skylar is in the bottom for the third time and was my early pick to make it to the finale (where I thought she'd finish second to Colton Dixon, so that shows what I know). The judges agree that this is the best top 5 ever, so it's impossible to actually say anyone deserves to go home more than anyone else.

Skylar Laine is eliminated!

Oh, hell no!!!

What is going on here? How are my two favorite singers both gone already? This is just the worst. This season is all kinds of wrong because there's no way on earth Skylar should be gone. Well, next week Carla Patton returns, and I'm glad because I'm not sure I want to recap "American Idol" without Colton Dixon and Skylar Laine. I know a lot of people say they're going to stop watching a show after this person or that person goes home. But really, if it weren't for the fact that this is my job, I'd be done. I'm sure on finale night Colton and Skylar will blow whoever is left out of the water.

What do you think of Thursday night's results? Did America get it right?

"American Idol" airs Wednesdays and Thursdays at 8 p.m. ET/PT on FOX.

Brandi Glanville was all set to graduate from friend to full-fledged housewife on Season 3 of "The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills," according to Radar Online.

Then LeAnn Rimes squashed her dream like a bug.

Glanville's children are now also Rimes' -- since the country singer married Glanville's ex-husband, Eddie Cibrian. And Rimes and Cibrian won't allow the children, Jake and Mason, to appear on the Bravo reality show.

Bing: More about 'The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills' | Eddie Cibrian

“Brandi didn’t expect that LeAnn and Eddie would have objections since the kids have been on the show before, but they did,” an unnamed source told Radar Online.

So the network reneged on its offer to Glanville, according to the report, insisting that the kids are necessary to expand her story line to full-fledged housewife size.

Also: Is your favorite show returning in the fall?

As much as you've got to respect any decision not to expose kids to the pitfalls of fame, consider how Glanville must feel about having her dreams ruined twice by the same woman. (Cibrian was still married to Glanville when he began his affair with Rimes.)

Ouch!

Season 3 of "The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills" is expected to premiere this fall on Bravo.

By John Kubicek

BuddyTV

In the late 18th century, America kicked England's butt in the Revolutionary War. Now they're finally getting their revenge because it's British Week on "American Idol." It makes me wonder if "Pop Idol" in the U.K. ever does American Week. I also wonder if Hollie Cavanagh is actually a mole sent from Liverpool to steal our nation's singing competition secrets. To make this episode even more enjoyable, sing "For British eyes only!" from "Arrested Development" every time Hollie walks on stage.

Bing: More about 'American Idol' | Photos: See the top 5 singers

Anyway, as you may have noticed, BuddyTV's "American Idol" expert Carla Patton is out for the week on vacation. I'm filling in for her to recap the top 5 taking on British songs as well as music from the '60s -- two themes that have nothing in common. Maybe next week it will be Broadway musicals and the Tupac songbook. Or country songs and music by artists whose names start with the letter "P."

More: 'American Idol' on BuddyTV | Video: Watch 'American Idol' clips and more

And who better to mentor the kids for this week than Little Steven from the E Street Band, a man who is neither British nor a '60s musician. But he was on "The Sopranos," so it's probably best if I don't insult him. Now swap out your beer and pretzels for some tea and crumpets, because this is British "American Idol"!

OK, that "New Girl" promo of the cast talking about watching "American Idol" was hilarious. I wish the "New Girl" cast was with us for the whole show, "Mystery Science Theater 3000"-style.

One girl in the audience has a sign asking Ryan to do her hair. I know those people are probably planted by FOX, but I don't care because that was genius. It turns out Steven Van Zandt is Jimmy Iovine's BFF, which explains why he's the mentor.

Round 1: The '60s

Hollie Cavanagh: "River Deep, Mountain High" by Ike and Tina Turner

Once again, all the advice is for Hollie to stop thinking so damned much. I assumed this would be a disaster, but it's actually pretty darn entertaining. The girl can definitely sing. And for the first time all season, she steps it up as an entertainer and not just a singer. But I still don't see her in this role. It feels like she realized she couldn't beat Jessica Sanchez on ballads, so now she's trying to beat Skylar Laine on energy and spunk.

Phillip Phillips: "The Letter" by the Box Tops

He's changing it up, big time, and Jimmy kind of hates it. It's worth noting Lee DeWyze sang this song in Season 9. In case you don't know what a letter is, the screen behind Phillip has envelopes falling. The "Idol" graphics department needs to stop being so literal. The song itself is exactly what you'd expect because Phillip does the same thing on every song. Jennifer Lopez doesn't know the song, and the judges point out there was no melody. But they don't care. Ryan Seacrest then steals the spotlight by making a joke about how Julianne Hough called Phillip "yummy." It turns out Phillip has a girlfriend, and she's a brunette. I hope that doesn't hurt his votes.

Skylar Laine: "Fortunate Son" by Creedence Clearwater Revival

Yes. Yes. A thousand times yes! This is so Skylar it hurts -- a down and dirty piece of rocking country goodness. She's like the Tasmanian devil of country rock. Please, America. Let her win -- because I'm kind of in love with her.

Joshua Ledet and Phillip Phillips: "You've Lost That Loving Feeling" by the Righteous Brothers

These two should not sing together ... ever. Even the "funny" banter before they sing is awkward because Phillip is playing up his "Aw shucks, I'm just a country boy who don't know nothing" act, and Joshua doesn't seem to know what to do with it. When Phillip sings "Something beautiful's dying," I feel the same way. Imagine if, instead of an iceberg, the Titanic crashed into the Hindenburg. Then double it. That's how bad this was. I think Steven Tyler had a stroke because he rambles endlessly about how much he loved it. Did we hear the same song?

Jessica Sanchez: "Proud Mary" by Creedence Clearwater Revival/Tina Turner

Little Steven hates this song because he's heard it so many damn times. I kind of agree, especially because this means all three girls basically sing the same style of song for round one (since this song was famously done by the artists who did Hollie and Skylar's songs). I'm really torn on this one. Jessica sings it amazingly, of course. And she has a ton of energy. But, somehow, it feels artificial, like this isn't really who she is and she's just playing a role. Maybe it's because she did so many old-fashioned ballads early on, but I don't buy her as a fun teenager, even though she is one. Randy Jackson is right to criticize it, and Jennifer Lopez is awful because she thinks everything is sunny all the time.

Joshua Ledet: "Ain't Too Proud to Beg" by the Temptations

This is almost too easy for him. It's so in his wheelhouse. Joshua could nail this song in his sleep, and he does. For some reason, I'm bored of Phillip doing the same thing every week. But I don't mind that Joshua does it. But as good as it is, I keep waiting for another "When a Man Loves a Woman" moment. Steven Tyler calls him one of the two best "Idol" singers of all time. I wonder who the other one is. Stefano Langone maybe? Randy compares him to Terence Trent D'Arby, which seems like a backhanded compliment.

Round 1 Verdict

The judges agree that Joshua, Hollie and Skylar all won. So basically they're saying Phillip and Jessica sucked. That seems about right to me.

Round 2: Brit Pop

Hollie Cavanagh: "Bleeding Love" by Leona Lewis

She's once again trying to sing a huge song. And wow. That is what I like to call a moment. At the start of the top 13, I thought she was a dark horse. Then she went off track, and I turned on her. But this is the girl I saw at the start of this competition. This is the girl I thought could sneak in and win the whole thing. Steven Tyler has never heard of this song, and Randy Jackson is so passive aggressive about it (as he should be since Leona Lewis won "The X Factor" in the U.K., a show that happens to be from Simon Cowell). Steven Tyler should be fired during the next commercial break for saying something so damn stupid.

Phillip Phillips: "Time of the Season" by the Zombies

Holy crap. Little Steven was right: Phillip is singing melody! Wait, I think I punctuated that wrong. Phillip is singing(?) melody. If this is what happens when Phillip steps outside of his tiny Dave Matthews box, he should go back in and never leave it. Seriously, that falsetto was just plain wrong. I feel like the judges know that Phillip is going to win this competition, so they're going out of their way not to say anything too mean.

Jessica Sanchez, Skylar Laine and Hollie Cavanagh: "(Your Love Keeps Lifting Me) Higher and Higher" by Jackie Wilson

Is it wrong that I associate this song with the "Ghostbusters 2" (when they use it to activate the goo and make the Statue of Liberty walk across New York City)? That movie is awesome, and this song is actually pretty good, too. All three girls sang the same style in the first half of the show, so they blend much better than the guys.

Skylar Laine: "You Don't Have to Say You Love Me" by Dusty Springfield

The common theme of the mentor sessions seems to be that Jimmy and Little Steven are having fun, which annoys me because it should be about the singers not Jimmy and his BFF. And Skylar just did the same thing Hollie did, which is slow it down and give an amazingly powerful performance. I love that Skylar can actually sing beautifully and tell stories. She's not just a spitfire. I'm glad Randy Jackson points out how silly it is that the sets are starting to involve actors sitting on benches. That was just weird.

Jessica Sanchez: "You Are So Beautiful" as performed by Joe Cocker

Huh. This is an interesting choice for her, and Jimmy is worried that it might sound like Muzak. In the end, I can't decide if I liked it or not. The girl is definitely an unbelievable singer, and her control and notes are insanely perfect. And it's slow and emotional and should be a real moment. But I don't feel it. There's a disconnect here between the beauty of her singing and the actual story. Even the final close-up of her face made it look like she was trying to force out a tear to prove how good she is. The judges, naturally, love it. Then we get yet another "Ryan cross-dressing" joke as he helps Jessica put on her high heels.

Joshua Ledet: "To Love Somebody" by the Bee Gees

Thankfully, this marks the last time we have to see the Jimmy and Steven comedy hour, which is the most annoying, self-serving nonsense this show has ever subjected us to. I don't care about Jimmy Iovine, and I certainly don't care about him and his friend joking around. Anyway, Joshua does his best to put his gospel spin on this song. And after a rather boring and tepid first half, he takes us to church! Preach on, Reverend James Brown! That's the Joshua I love, but what I don't love is that the judges give their boy his 100th standing ovation of the season.

I'm so over the judges standing for Joshua, and it kind of makes me resent him, even though he's very good. Jennifer Lopez says he's one of the best singers in 50 years. They gave him the Pimp Spot already. They don't need to keep pimping him this hard. Like I said, it was really good. But the judges act like he just cured cancer while bringing peace to the Middle East.

Final Verdict

This is going to be hard to predict. Realistically, Phillip Phillips probably did the worst out of the top 5, but we keep on being told how much everyone loves him, and he's never been in the bottom. I think we could be in for some crazy results tomorrow night along with Carrie Underwood and Coldplay.

What did you think of Wednesday night's performances? Who's in trouble?
 

"American Idol" airs Wednesdays and Thursdays at 8 p.m. ET/PT on FOX.